


Put Me Back Together

by lowlifetheory



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst, But They're Seperated, Character death - sheriff stilinski, Established Relationship, M/M, Married Couple, They Have Kids
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-11-14
Updated: 2013-01-06
Packaged: 2017-11-18 16:29:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,219
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/563063
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lowlifetheory/pseuds/lowlifetheory
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tomorrow, Derek decided, he was talking to a divorce lawyer.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Hurt

'Daddy!' Lilly cried with her arms stretched wide running towards Derek.

'Hey baby.' Derek knelt down and wrapped her in his arms, burying his face in her neck and closing his eyes, breathing her in. 'I missed you.'

'I missed you more.' Lilly said in that tight little voice that meant tears weren't far away. Moments later the salt tinged Derek's senses and he pulled her tighter. He could feel the rainwater that was lingering on the sidewalk soak into the knees of his jeans, and the light mizzle that had been misting the air started to fall in earnest now. Derek curled himself around Lilly and stood up, carrying her to the front door.

He kept his head down, eyes on the path, and then the bottom of the door as a pair of white socked feet came into view, baggy jeans covering half of them. Derek ran his eyes up Stiles's body, over stretched out knees, low slung hips and baggy layers. 'Hey.' He said tentatively.

'What are you doing here Derek?' Stiles asked with a frown. His heartbeat was steady, his scent natural. Derek remembered the days when Stiles's heart would crash around his chest in excitement; his scent would reek of arousal, apprehension, delight.

'I got a few days off.' Derek explained not letting go of Lilly. 'I tried to call first, your tone was dead, and you didn't answer the home phone.'

'I was bathing Harvey. And I changed my number.' Stiles said.

Hurt curled through Derek's guts like thick smoke. 'What if I need you for the kids?' Derek asked.

'The kids are with me, I'll contact you if I think it's important.' Stiles said in a neutral tone.

Derek nodded again, breathing in the scent of Lilly's hair. She smelled like fresh bubble-gum shampoo. 'Can I take you three to dinner?'

'We're busy tonight. Scott's babysitting; I'm going on a date.' Stiles said. Derek felt his muscles tighten at the thought of Stiles being with someone else, laughing with someone else, and lying with someone else. The thought of someone else touching Derek's children, being allowed to see them and be with them when Derek wasn't.

Once, a long time ago, Stiles had promised Derek that he'd give him a second chance, but every time Derek tried to ask for it he was refused. Stiles kept knocking him back and Derek kept coming back for more. Stiles thought he hated Derek, but Derek hated himself so much more. He shifted Lilly in his arms, hoping she'd cling to him a little longer; perhaps he'd catch a glimpse of Harvey too, and reached into his pocket. There was an envelope with some cash and a check for Stiles. He reached it over and Stiles took it careful not to touch Derek.

'Is it not enough?' Derek asked when Stiles raised an eyebrow.

'It'll do.' Stiles conceded folding it and the cash and slipping it into his back pocket. Derek remembered the days back when Stiles was in college, the days when Derek would drive for eight hours, just to spend the night next to Stiles, even if Stiles was busy with study or classes, or the one night Derek sat at Stiles door waiting for him, when they got just an hour together before Stiles had to go to class, Derek remembered kissing Stiles goodbye and tucking cash into his back pocket, turning the gesture into a filthy grope, because he'd promised to support Stiles, and he knew how expensive the student lifestyle was.

'Can Daddy come in and see my room?' Lilly turned to ask Stiles.

'I think Daddy has somewhere to be.' Stiles said raising his chin. There was a crash from the living room, and a filthy laugh from Harvey, and Stiles smiled like he knew what had just happened. Derek didn't, he wanted to, he longed to push past Stiles to see his son, but he stood his ground, held his daughter.

'I never see you.' Lilly turned wet eyes to Derek.

'I'm sorry baby.' Derek told her kissing her hair, running his hand down her back. There was a faint trace of Harvey on her, and Derek catalogued it, memorised it, so he could study it later. 'Can I see Harvey, just before I go?' Derek tried again.

'He's too easily excited. I need him calm for Scott when he comes over later.' Stiles lied, raising an eyebrow, challenging Derek to pull him on the lie. Derek didn't, just nodded and handed Lilly to Stiles.

'I'll see you soon baby.' Derek said softly.

'No you won’t, you never come around and see us.' Lilly pouted and turned her face into Stiles's neck.

Derek's chest tightened, he wanted to scream, to fight, to tell her that Stiles didn't allow him to, but how would a four year old understand that, understand that one parent hated the other. He didn't want to turn her against Stiles, she didn't deserve that, and Stiles didn't deserve that.

Stiles licked his lips and took a half step towards him, opening his mouth to speak but Derek didn't want his pity. He honestly didn't think he could handle it.

'I'll see you.' Derek said backing down the driveway. He got into his car and contemplated moving it, parking across the street and spying on Stiles but he didn't want to torture himself any more. Instead he drove to the liquor store, and bought a few bottles of Jack, hoping that would do it.

His apartment was sparse. It had two bedrooms, and Derek already had sleeping space for his kids that was never used, toys still in their packaging, and a thin layer of dust coating them. There was juice in the fridge, kid’s juice that Derek replenished every so often, and kids snacks in his cupboards. He even had it childproofed, dangerous corners protected and child locks on the doors. Four toothbrushes sat in his bathroom, two kids ones, two adults ones. Derek only used one.

He slumped on his couch and opened one of the bottles, taking a swig from the bottle. Jack, his drink of choice. The Sheriff's drink of choice.  
Derek had shared plenty of drinks with the Sheriff, when Stiles was away, and they were both lonely, they would eat day old pizza together, watch old cop shows, Derek would crawl into Stiles's bed, and live there for days. The Sheriff, who had begged Derek to save his life, to bite him, when he was dying on the floor of a convenience store that had just been robbed, three bullets in his gut. 'I want to see Harvey and Lilly grow up.' The Sheriff pleaded, blood already bubbling from his lips. 'Please son, please.'

And Derek had, he had bit the Sheriff, in hope that maybe he was wrong, that maybe he had enough time. The Sheriff died in his arms, his blood flowing faster than his body could shift. Derek had managed to lose a second father.

He couldn't comfort Stiles, he tried, but Stiles was furious with Derek for biting his father. They never found who done it, who fired the shots that took the Sheriff's life, and Stiles was at a loss so he turned his blame and hatred on Derek, and Derek lost his family too. He had considered killing himself, but then the family money, the life insurances, it would all die with him and Stiles would be left with nothing. Derek loved Stiles still, he wouldn't do that to him, wouldn't do that to his kids.

There was a knock at the door, and Derek noticed he was already halfway down the bottle, nowhere near drunk yet. It would take another few to get to the state he wanted. He didn’t think he’d ordered food, couldn’t remember annoying a neighbour. He sighed and opened the door to reveal Stiles standing there, hands in his pockets.

Derek looked at him, catching his teeth between his lips the way Stiles used to do when he was nervous. Derek wasn’t nervous, he was suddenly furious. He was finished with this, with everything. ‘What?’ He snapped. Tomorrow, Derek decided, he was talking to a lawyer. He’d protected Stiles in his grief long enough, he’d been an understanding husband, he’d allowed Stiles to wallow pitifully and now, now Derek wanted what was his, wanted his children too.

He was going to move on with his life, he was going to find someone who could hopefully make him half as happy as Stiles used to do. He didn’t want to do it to the kids, but he deserved some form of happiness didn’t he.

‘I thought you had a date?’ Derek asked.

‘It’s one of our anniversaries.’ Stiles answered him.

‘Ten years since our first date.’ Derek replied and enjoyed the moment of Stiles faltering on his doorstep. Stiles nodded and stood there, his hands deep in his pockets.

‘They read my dad’s will this morning. A long wait, held up by police complications apparently.’ Stiles said rocking on his heels.

Derek looked up and down the hallway, it was empty and Stiles looked lost in the middle of it. ‘So?’ Derek asked.

‘There was a suggestion that you attend,’ Stiles bit his lip, ‘he mentioned you.’

‘Come in.’ Derek stood back and held the door wide. Stiles did, padding into the kitchen and looking around. ‘Drink?’ Derek asked but Stiles shook his head.

‘He left you a few things.’ Stiles said and Derek noticed the wooden box he held.

‘Why didn’t you tell me this earlier?’ Derek snapped. He was hurt, why couldn’t Stiles have just let Derek sit on the sofa, watch his kids, give him whatever he had to before he needed to go out.

‘I needed to do this in private. Harvey isn’t conductive to a quiet conversation.’ Stiles said fondly. Derek glared, he knew nothing about Harvey or his manners, and Stiles was basically rubbing Derek’s face in his knowledge of their son.

Derek opened the box. There was an envelope with his name on it, a wedding ring, and a picture. Derek gasped; the photograph was Derek’s own father with his arm slung around the Sheriff’s shoulders. Derek was in it too, a child in his father’s arms, but unlike the adults he was leaning across his father’s body, and into the Sheriffs, his fingers hooked on the edge of a blanket that was wrapped around a baby in the Sheriff’s arms. He turned it over.

Johnny, hopefully our boys will have a stronger friendship than we do, Sam.

‘That’s you.’ Derek said touching the picture. Stiles just nodded. The wedding ring he picked up and examined next. It belonged to the Sheriff. Stiles stared at it, and the letter, almost jealously.

‘He wanted you to have the ring for some reason.’ Stiles said. Derek could detect a trace of hurt in Stiles’s voice, hurt that it hadn’t been given to him. ‘And the letter.’

‘Have you read it?’ Derek asked. It was unopened but that didn’t mean Stiles had his tricks.

‘No.’ Stiles admitted. ‘May I, after you?’

‘No.’ Derek said and for the first time since he seen Stiles earlier an emotion welled from him, hurt, and anger. Stiles didn’t deserve to be hurt, not now. ‘It’s addressed to me.’

‘You said once, you told me that whatever belonged to you belonged to me.’ Stiles swallowed.

Derek snorted down at his hands. ‘Things change.’ He muttered.

Stiles nodded and swallowed.

‘Can I do anything else for you?’ Derek asked. He was aware he was being rude but he wanted to be alone.

‘I want my ring back.’ Stiles said pressing his hands into his pockets.

‘He left it to me.’ Derek said frowning into the box.

‘Not that one. Our rings, I want it back.’ Stiles said.

‘The one you put on my finger?’ Derek asked. The one Derek wore to bed every night, just to prolong his torture and suffering.

‘No, the one you put on me.’ Stiles said. Derek remembered having that ring thrown at him; he remembered the pain of the tiny band hitting him in the chest like it was a twenty ton truck.

‘What are you going to do with it?’ Derek asked and he hated that his voice sounded vulnerable.

‘I’m going to earn it back; I’m going to earn the right to wear it, to have it on my finger, to call myself your husband.’ Stiles said.

Hope bubbled in the pit of Derek’s stomach, small, and weak, but there. ‘What changed?’ Derek couldn’t help but ask.

‘Today, the will reading, something Lilly said, something Harvey did, something you implied, you turning up, it just...connected.’ Stiles shrugged. ‘All I know is that for the past year I’ve been so alone, and I’ve been hurting without you, and I’ve missed you, and I’ve been punishing both of us for something neither of us had any control over, and I don’t want to do that anymore, I want to move on, I want to be happy, I want to wake up and see you every day, I want to bicker over who’s turn it is to take out the trash or bath Harvey.’

‘You were hardly punishing yourself when you had our kids to yourself.’ Derek couldn’t help but say. He needed to get it out there, needed to speak his mind.

Stiles shook his head. ‘You’re wrong, because every time I shot you down, it hurt me as much as it hurt you, I wanted to hurt you because hurting you hurt me, and that hurt made the grief feel better somehow.’

‘Jesus Stiles,’ Derek muttered turning away.

‘Will you come for dinner with me, tomorrow night; can we get past this Derek?’ Stiles asked from behind him.

‘I don’t know Stiles.’ Derek said to the room at large. ‘I don’t know.’


	2. Healing

Everything Derek did in his life, he did for Stiles. He waited until Stiles was eighteen to start a proper relationship, he made sure the summer between high school and college was memorable, amazing, everything Stiles had ever wanted, he watched him leave for college, he befriended the Sheriff (although that relationship eventually grew past having just Stiles in common to Derek spending time with his father in law), he helped Stiles out with school fees so Stiles didn't have to take a part time job, he bought the house Stiles wanted, the car Stiles wanted. The first time Derek proposed Stiles said no, and Derek's heart landed somewhere six feet south of his feet, Stiles said no but they stayed together. 

'Get over it, Derek, I'm still here.' Stiles had shoved Derek back onto the bed and clambered on top of him, already undressing. Stiles wasn't ready, so Derek waited for that too. He didn't even propose again, Stiles just told him it was time they exchanged vows. Derek followed Stiles like the puppy he was, let Stiles rule his life, paid the bills, the small mortgage on their home, indulged Stiles when they decided to have children and Stiles wanted to work part time instead of carry on the full time job he was already holding down.

When the Sheriff died Derek waited for Stiles to get over his grief, he waited until Stiles allowed him to see the kids, on Stiles's terms. He bought a place, chose it for himself, and even decorated it alone, no input from Stiles at all. 

And the day the Sheriff's will was read, that moment when Stiles turned up, when he had chased Derek away earlier and visited him again Derek got tired of indulging Stiles. Derek loved Stiles, and wanted to spend the rest of his life with Stiles, even now, even after the hurt, but things needed to change. Derek wasn't going to be the doormat, the one putting everything into this relationship. Derek was an Alpha werewolf, and now he figured himself to be at least competent. He didn't wake up the morning after his uncle died and suddenly become awesome, it took years of learning, training, getting things wrong, learning from his mistakes and carrying on, making things right again.

He did, he believed, do right by Stiles, he did everything on Stiles's terms, but he realised now what the Sheriff had warned him about years ago, he had let Stiles take advantage of him, take him for granted. 

Derek went to talk to his lawyer about his family. Lilly and Harvey were biologically Derek's children, but Stiles had adopted them from birth, he was their father too. 'We have a case for full custody,' his lawyer had said, crossing long smooth legs and flashing a winning grin. She was in her forties, and Derek remembered her trailing after her predecessor when he was a teenager and his fathers lawyer had been a frequent visitor to their home. He had crushed on her then, but things had changed if her scent was anything to go by, her confidence had grown. She noticed him and for a second Derek was tempted, he'd been alone for a year. He didn't want to be the cliché screwing his divorce lawyer, if they divorced that was. He kept his hands to himself, sat back and watched her check him out as she spoke, smug in the knowledge that it wasn't just Stiles who seen him as attractive, that he could have more than Stiles, if he wanted to. 

Then he went for coffee with Boyd. Boyd was frank and open as always, 'yes Stiles takes advantage, grow a set Derek, your kids are probably going to be werewolves, man up and tell Stiles to get with the programme or get out,' and other various phrases. Derek nodded his way through the conversation. 

'Am I pathetic?' He asked eyeing Boyd. His second in command shrugged a shoulder.

'No, that's not the language I'd use, you love him, and you indulge him, it needs to stop.' Boyd said. Derek nodded. 'I'm not saying don't spoil him, just say no when you want to, fight back.'

'Do you respect me?' Derek said picking at the napkin his cup was sitting on.

'I'll always respect you after what you did for us, and I love you like a brother.' Boyd added. 'I'm saying no more.'

Derek snorted and nodded at the same time. That's why he chose Boyd, why he loved him, Boyd was blunt and honest, and Derek was a better person because of him. 

Derek ate dinner in a diner, and openly flirted with the waitress. It made him feel good, releasing endorphins that he hadn’t felt in a long time, he couldn't remember the last time he flirted, even with Stiles. He waited until he figured the kids were in bed then swung past the house. He looked good and he knew it, leaning against the doorframe waiting for Stiles to open it. Stiles stared for a second when he did, his eyes roaming across Derek's body, tight black vee neck, a belt buckle that he knew drew the eye. He looked like he was on the pull, looking for sex, and Stiles knew it. 

'Hi.' Stiles said almost shyly. 

'Hi, I need to be somewhere soon; I just dropped by to tell you that we need that talk. I had a chat with a divorce lawyer today, and she seems to think I have a case for custody too, so...' Derek let his words hang in the air. Stiles paled slightly and shifted nervously. Derek scented the air, he was alone, save for the children, but there was a slight tint of arousal and apprehension rolling off him. Derek realised Stiles had been cocky in his relationship, knowing Derek worshipped him and taking advantage of that.

'I...okay...' Stiles stuttered over his words breathlessly. 

'Good,' Derek said straightening his back, 'I'll be over after four tomorrow, that should be enough time for me to play with the kids for a few hours and help you put them to bed.' Derek took a step back. 'We can talk when they're asleep.'

Stiles just licked his lips and opened his mouth but Derek took the opportunity to reply away by turning and leaving, sending a short wave Stiles's way as he got into his car. 

Derek wasn't lying when he said he had somewhere to be. His pack was delighted to see him pad into the bar, and Erica immediately wrapped herself around him, kissing his cheek. 'Dance, please.' She pleaded with him, her puppy dog eyes making his belly churn uncomfortably. 

'Okay,' Derek let her lead him to the crowded dance floor. She wrapped her hands around his neck and they moved together, his hands on her hips. The rest of his pack mingled around and Derek spent some much needed catching up time, eventually slumping beside Jackson who just raised an eyebrow at him. 

'Are you looking for someone to mount?' Jackson asked bluntly taking a sip of his glass of amber liquid. 

Derek flung an arm around Jackson's shoulders. 'You offering?' He teased. Jackson scowled at him and tried to shrug him off but Derek wouldn't budge. 'I'm trying to get my family back together.' 

'Fucking around while Stiles sits with the kids.' Jackson said. 'Smooth.'

'Shut up. If Stiles isn't interested in joining my family that's his problem. I know you'll run to Lydia if I don't clarify this, so I'll say it once. I love Stiles, I want him, badly, but I want my kids too, and even if Stiles won't come back to me then I'll certainly be making arrangements into taking steps towards spending more time with my children, as in, joint custody at least.' Derek grinned at Jackson and stood up when Kelly, Isaac's latest girlfriend reached for his hand for a dance. 

'Alpha's popular tonight.' He heard Jackson mutter as he followed the brunette to the dance floor.

It worked, of course Derek knew it would, because when he went to visit his home the next evening, Lilly opened the door and dragged him inside. 'Da!' Harvey cried half walking half crawling towards him with arms outstretched. Derek hauled him up and Harvey went about scenting his father with his drool. Stiles was in the kitchen, a dish cloth tossed across his shoulder. He was rushing around from pots to oven, to chopping board. He looked good in baggy jeans, with flour on his nose and something like happiness in his eyes. 

Lilly was in her element with her family together, and Derek and Stiles did a great deal of flirting. Harvey demanded attention as often as he could and Lilly was as precious as ever, ordering her parents around when they allowed it. When she pouted at Stiles suggesting bed time Derek couldn’t keep the smile off his lips when he heard Stiles promise Lilly she would see her Daddy a lot more often than she had lately. 

When the kids were in bed Derek turned the iPod on low and sat on the couch while Stiles uncapped two bottles of beer. They sat side by side, knees touching. Derek was aware that some tight clothes, a home cooked meal and cuddles and kisses with the kids didn't get them back together but it was a start.

'Did you want to talk?' Stiles asked biting his bottom lip. 

'I did.' Derek said setting his bottle on the coffee table. 'Like Lydia told you this morning, because of what Jackson told me, I want my family back, and I'm going to get it, whether or not that includes you is up to you Stiles, but I'm not going to wait around forever, and I'm not a punch bag for your emotions, I'm not your doormat, so from now on things will be different.'

'Jackson thinks I should woo you.' Stiles said. Derek smiled. In the early day's Derek had done all the chasing, made all the first moves, and he had enjoyed it. 

'Maybe Jackson's right?' Derek asked with a smile. Stiles laughed and Derek joined him.

They talked for hours, until Derek's beer was warm and the clock was creeping past midnight. 'I should go.' Derek said standing and stretching the kinks out of his back.

'Good night.' Stiles said at the door, reaching a hand out to catch Derek's elbow and brushing a kiss against Derek's lips. 

The next day a large bouquet of flowers arrived at work for Derek, and with a quirk of his eyebrow he read the ridiculous card from Stiles inviting him out on a date. Jackson smirked from his desk. 'Bitch,' he muttered playfully. 

Derek just laughed like he hadn't done in a long time.


	3. Closing The Wounds

For the first time in over a year Derek felt actual happiness. He headed home, taking the ridiculous flowers with him and placed them on the counter. On the card Stiles had invited Derek to dinner the next evening but Derek had a meeting on Friday morning he needed to prepare for. 

Thanks for the flowers, can't do tomorrow, it'll have to be Friday night. 

 

The text went and Derek pulled the fridge door open just as there was a knock at the front door. With a frown Derek opened it, he rarely had visitors, and his pack usually called or sent a text so he could expect their arrival.

 

'Hale?' The guy asked. 

 

'Yes?' Derek replied noting the sack of food in the guy’s hand. 

 

'Here, this is for you.' He handed over the unmarked brown paper bag. 

 

'I'll just get my wallet.' Derek said at a loss for what to do. 

 

'It’s paid.' The guy shrugged and backed away. 

 

Derek took the bag and went to the half of the table he used for eating, pushed yesterday’s newspaper aside and peeked inside. There was potato and meat gnocchi in a tomato sauce and a cheese and bacon garlic bread, Derek's favourite meal from the restaurant he and Stiles used to go to all the time on dates, the restaurant that closed down about three years ago. There was even a container at the bottom with a large piece of blueberry cheesecake.

 

On closer inspection Derek noted the meal looked homemade, and there were little imperfections, like an unskilled person, or a child had helped out. He was halfway through when he discovered the pages folded inside the brown paper bag it was delivered in. One was obviously painted by a toddler, blobs and splashes of colour at random places on the page. The other was Lilly's work, a family portrait of stick figures with round bellies. The last was from Stiles, in his slanted messy writing asking what meal Derek would like delivered next Wednesday. 

 

'Nice one Stiles.' Derek said, sending a text to thank Stiles for the meal then getting some paperwork out of the way. 

 

XXX

 

Stiles had tried all night to play footsie with Derek but Derek had managed to evade him the whole time by keeping his feet underneath his chair. They were in Louie's, eating together, and so far all they'd talked about was good memories, so Stiles looked shocked when Derek announced he wanted to see a marriage councillor. 

 

'Is it necessary?' Stiles asked studying his side salad. 

 

'Yes. Clearly it was going wrong before your dad...' Derek stopped himself, biting his tongue. 

 

'...died.' Stiles finished for him. Derek nodded. 'I'm already seeing someone, for that, because I'm obviously not...'

'Why don't we ask if they do couples?' Derek suggested. Stiles nodded but his demeanour had completely changed. Derek reached a foot out and hooked it around Stiles's ankle. Stiles looked up and smiled, soft and sincere. 

 

'I think that's a good idea.' Stiles said biting his lip. 'I'm going to my session on Saturday morning. I haven't got around to asking Scott if he'd...'

 

'Yes.' Derek said. Stiles smiled at him again and plucked a cherry tomato from his plate, popping it into his mouth. 

 

They had met at the restaurant, but Stiles was shifting nervously outside, obviously not wanting the night to end. 'I'm sorry.' He blurted as they stood beside Derek's car. 'I'm a shitty husband and a shitty father and I was probably a shitty son too.' 

 

'We both made mistakes.' Derek conceded. 

 

'I hurt everybody, I hurt my I hurt me and, I...I hurt the man I love.' Stiles bit at his lips. 

 

'The catalyst seems to be the same for both of us. If you'd have asked me back on Sunday I would have been there in a second. You cut me deep, and I can't forget that, I won't, but I will try this again, and I'll not look for anyone else while I'm with you.' Derek said but he softened his words with a squeeze of Stiles arm. 

 

'It’ll work. It will.' Stiles promised swallowing. 

 

'It better.' Derek breathed crowding Stiles against the car and running his nose along Stiles's neck, scenting him, lips catching Stiles rapid pulse. They were pressed together, Derek's hands resting on Stiles's hips as his lips brushed against Stiles's. 

 

Stiles tried to deepen the kiss but Derek stepped back with a smirk. 'See you in the morning.' He said leaving Stiles slumped against the car. 

 

Lilly was beaming when Derek arrived half an hour before Stiles left for his counselling session. Harvey had looked at him for a second and dismissed him, clearly more interested in dismantling the little ride on truck he had sitting beside him. Derek quickly distracted him from breaking the toy, by setting him on it and pulling him backwards. Harvey squealed in delight and Lilly took over, pushing the red truck around the room and laughing at her little brother. 

 

'Will you be okay?' Stiles asked as he pulled a scarf around his neck at the front door. 

 

'I'll be fine.' Derek promised. 

 

'I can bring lunch back with me; you can hang out here for a while if you want.' Stiles said looking at his feet. 'It's your house.' His voice was quiet and sorry.

 

'You're going to be late.' Derek said tapping his watch. Stiles nodded and left Derek with a kiss on the cheek and a big smile on his face. 

 

On Wednesday afternoon they went to their first couple’s session. Stiles fidgeted nervously but Derek relaxed back into the couch. He liked this set up, the therapist, an older man by the name of Tom, sat in the middle of the couch across the coffee table from them. 'Why are you here?' Was the first thing he asked? 

 

Derek was unsure who the question was directed at, and he looked at Stiles. Stiles didn't look back, just examined his shoes. 'I want to save our marriage.' Stiles spoke just as Derek was about to.

 

'And you Derek?' Tom said. 'What do you want from all this.'

 

Derek had thought about this all week, what he wanted from the rest of his life. He'd never been one for talking, using short clipped sentences and letting Stiles say what they needed. 

 

'I want to save our marriage, but I also want to change it, I mean, clearly something wasn't working before, and that needs to be addressed.' Derek said. Stiles looked up at him and bit his lip, then nodded slightly. 

 

'And what do you think needs to change Derek?'

 

'I need to be more assertive. I worship the ground Stiles walks on, I always have, and I let him make all the decisions because I thought it was what he wanted, because I wanted to make everything perfect for him. I wanted Stiles to have all he ever wanted.'

 

'It's true.' Stiles broke in looking away. 'When Derek proposed to me, I said no because I could, because I wanted to see how he'd react.'

 

'And did he, react the way you expected him to?' The therapist asked. 

 

Stiles nodded. Derek reached a hand out and touched Stiles's fingers, caressing his knuckle. 'Hey, we can work through that.'

 

'Okay.' Stiles said. 

 

'You know I have to be honest, I really don't think as a couple you need a therapist, certainly Stiles does, but I think this is something you can work on together.' 

 

'Do you mind if we come back, just for a few more, until Stiles gets comfortable with everything.' Derek said. The man smiled at him, soft and warm and Stiles tried to hide a smile. 

 

'You'd still do anything for Stiles?' He said.

 

'Yes.' Derek nodded. 

 

'Including becoming more assertive?' Tom suggested. 

 

'Yes.' Derek nodded. 

 

'Good.' He said and Derek shot Stiles a smile. 'Then let’s talk some more.'

 

‘That’s fine with me.’ Derek said but he looked at Stiles.

 

‘Stiles,’ Tom started, ‘tell me, where do you think it went wrong?’

 

Stiles bit his lip, his breath caught in his throat. Derek realised that here, where Stiles was supposed to talk, he had no words, he was nervous and frightened and he looked so frightened and lost sitting there. Derek’s first instinct was to comfort him but he ignored it, Stiles needed to get over this fear on his own, Derek had already done enough for his husband, both good and bad, it was up to Stiles to do some work now.

 

‘I just think…Derek let me, it was like, in our group of friends Derek dominates, he’s like the leader of the pack if you will, and everybody respects him, and they go to him for advice and praise and any hard decisions, they, I don’t know, we’re like an extended family and Derek’s the Daddy. At home though, Derek just let me, like what he said earlier, he,’ Stiles made a noise and fisted his hands in his hair.

 

‘Hey whatever you say, it’s okay.’ Derek said. Stiles relaxed a little.

 

‘When you proposed and I said no you should have fought me, when you came down to see me at college you should have told me to come see you next time, when I asked for money you shouldn’t have given me what I asked for.’ Stiles said. ‘I feel like I’ve taken advantage of you our whole relationship.’

 

‘I was frightened of losing you then,’ Derek said softly. Stiles looked up sharply; they had forgotten Tom was even there.

 

‘And now?’ Stiles swallowed.

 

‘If I lose you now I’ll hurt, but I’ll get over it, I’ll move on and I’ll find someone else.’ Derek said. Stiles eyes widened and he bit his lip.

 

‘But we’re ma…we’re meant to be.’ Stiles said softly.

 

‘Any couple can break up,’ Derek replied.

 

XXX

 

‘I’m going to reduce my work hours.’ Derek announced.

 

‘Oh?’ Tom asked in that irritatingly calm way that Deaton used to speak. Derek wondered if they were related.

 

‘I’m going to work three and a half days a week, and the rest I’ll spend with my family.’ Derek said with a nod.

 

‘That’s a good idea Derek.’ Tom said with a smile. ‘What do you think Stiles?’

 

‘Should I work more?’ Stiles asked softly.

 

‘We built our own business.’ Derek explained to Tom at the cock of his head. ‘I thought that perhaps we could both work on a Monday, and you could work on a Thursday and Friday afternoon’s family day.’

 

‘I still maintain you don’t need me.’ Tom said from the corner but Derek couldn’t take his eyes away from Stiles slackened jaw.

 

The third session Derek announced he was moving back home.

 

‘Is that wise?’ Tom asked.

 

‘I think so.’ Derek said. ‘I’ll take the spare room for now, but this is working, and I need to be a part of my family once again, we need to get into a routine.’

 

‘The spare room.’ Tom smirked. Derek rolled his eyes.

 

‘Yes. I don’t want to rush things, we’ve done nothing more than kiss since we got back together, but I think it’s more important to build a structure with the children, don’t you agree Stiles.’ Derek said.

 

‘Yes.’ Stiles smiled from across the couch. He reached a hand out to squeeze Derek’s fingers, and Derek noticed he didn’t let go. Derek liked that, and left his hand there.

 

‘Three things,’ Tom said with a smile, ‘you really don’t need to see me as a couple anymore, but I would like to observe your family unit as a whole, just once, if that’s okay?’

 

‘It’s fine.’ Derek said. Stiles nodded his head.

 

‘Good, two, you are a wonderful couple and I expect things to work out for you, and three, Derek if you ever get tired of real estate and construction I think you would have a future with couples counselling.’ Tom grinned.

 

Derek laughed and he heard Stiles chuffing along with him.

 

‘Wonderful.’ Tom said and Derek thought about falling asleep in a house full of his family’s heartbeats.


	4. Stepping Out

The family fell into a routine a lot quicker than Derek expected. In everything, in every way, Derek and Stiles was a couple apart from their sleeping arrangements. They worked up to things slowly, of course, discussing Lilly's education or Harvey's doctor visits calmly at the dinner table after the kids were in bed. They spent time together, and organised their calendar around each other. 

Derek had been living there a month when Scott invited Lilly to a sleepover with his daughter Ellie. Ellie was only several months younger than Lilly, and his son Mikey was a similar age to Harvey. 

'There's no way you want both of them!' Stiles said looking to where Harvey and Mikey were untying Mikey's laces. 'You'll bury them!'

'We'll cope.' Scott said with an easy grin Derek watched as they kids happily followed Scott down the garden path. It was a Saturday and Derek had the feeling they'd been set up. 

'Why don't we go for dinner?' Derek suggest after the car had left the street. Stiles smiled softly and stood up, nodding his head. 

'That sounds like fun.' Stiles agreed, pecking Derek on the cheek on his way past. 

Derek followed him, but instead of going to his own room he leaned on the doorjamb of what used to be their bedroom, what would hopefully be their bedroom again. 'Hey do you want me to shave?' Derek asked. Stiles turned surprised eyes to him and smiled. 

'No, I like my men scruffy.' Stiles grinned as he padded back to the door and sliding his arms around Derek's shoulders, kissing his lips. 'Do you want me to shave?'

'Yeah, I like my men baby smooth.' Derek said softly. It had come out breathier than he intended. His hands slid around Stiles's waist, down over the familiar dip of his back and over the curve of his ass.

'I love you, and I'm so sorry I messed this up.' Stiles said. Derek looked at him for a long while, long enough for Stiles to try and pull away. 

'It wasn't your entire fault.' Derek pulled him closer. 'And I love you too.' Derek caught his lips and deepened the kiss. Stiles wound his fingers into the collar of Derek's shirt and held him as Derek's tongue traced over familiar patterns between Stiles's lips. 

Stiles's hands drifted down Derek's sides, pausing to tickle them softly before finding the waistband of his jeans, and dipping them underneath. He hooked a leg around Derek's waist and Derek gripped him under the thighs, hauling him close to his body, Stiles's hands still teasing the hem of Derek's boxers. 

'Fuck Derek, please, just fuck me.' Stiles breathed. 

'Is that what you want, you want me to fuck you?' Derek asked. Stiles bobbed his head, swallowing. 'Perhaps we should change our bedroom dynamic too, what do you say?'

'There was nothing wrong with our sex life.' Stiles pouted. 

'I could say no, no sex, Stiles...how would you feel about that?' Derek wondered.

'I want every part of you, in me, around me, own me Derek, I want you to own me.' Stiles pleaded.

'Are you, are you really mine? All mine?' Derek asked. Stiles nodded frantically. 'Prove it.'

Stiles swallowed and tried to move, swatting at Derek's hands. 'Put me down.' He demanded and Derek released him with a frown, wondering what Stiles was up to. Stiles fell to his knees and a little part of Derek was disappointed. It may have started off about sex, but he was sure Stiles knew Derek's meanings went deeper now, but Stiles surprised him, he didn't open his pants or touch his crotch, instead he took Derek's hands in his, and kissed each finger, lingering where the pale strip of skin on Derek's left hand waited for the ring Derek had worn for seven years to return. 

'Derek will you do me the honour of marrying me?' Stiles asked, surprising Derek further. 

He remembered the day he proposed to Stiles, in this very room as they painted it. Stiles had shoved him and said no, Stiles had laughed it off as something they didn't need, something that wasn’t necessary. Now here he was on his knees looking at Derek expectantly. 

'We're already married.' Derek pointed out. Stiles nodded.

'Retake our vows, lets retake our vows, I want to tell you how much I love you, how much you mean to me in front of everyone we know, I want to do it right, not a handful of us. I want everyone to know how much you mean to me.' Stiles said gripping his fingers. 

'Okay,' Derek grinned pulling Stiles to his feet and wrapping his arms around Stiles's waist, kissing him fiercely. 

Stiles returned the kiss for a moment before stepping back, pressing their foreheads together. 'We're going to do this right.' 

'You think I'm a blushing virgin?' Derek teased. Stiles smiled at him and pecked his lips once again. 

'I think we're both well past that stage.' Stiles said but his mouth hung open and his eyes widened in that "I have a plan forming" way.

'What?' Derek asked softly, his eyes wandering across Stiles. 

'Why don't we make it a Christmas wedding? Well, not Christmas but festive, like before Christmas, what do you say?' Stiles suggested. Derek shrugged. It was November, getting a date to suit a lot of people at short notice could cause problems, but then again this was their day.

'Twenty first of December?' Derek suggested off the top of his head. Stiles gaped for a second and then nodded. 

'It's going to be epic.' Stiles grinned, and Derek remembered the boy he'd fallen in love with, the man he had come to love, and it made Derek's heart ache for the time lost, for the heartbreak that they would never really get over, but they would move on from it, Derek knew in his heart that they would move on and he would eventually forgive Stiles. 'I'm going to make sure it's the best day of your life, and then I promise it will be the best night of your life.' Stiles said sliding his arms around Derek's body and pressing a kiss to his lips. 

'Let's go out for dinner.' Derek said stepping backwards. Stiles smirked and followed him, turning the lights out as he went. Sex could wait, for now their relationship was much more important.


End file.
